The blackened forest
Smoulders yet
Because
He flipped
A cigarette
Burma-Shave |
Slow down, Pa
Sakes alive
Ma missed signs
Four And five
Burma-Shave |
Grandpa knows
It ain’t too late
He’s gone
To git
Some widder bait
Burma-Shave |
Free–free
A trip
To Mars
For ten thousand
Empty jars
Burma-Shave |
A Christmas hug
A birthday kiss
Awaits
The woman
Who gives this
Burma-Shave |
The big blue tube’s
Just like Louise
You get
A thrill
From every squeeze
Burma-Shave |
The monkey took
One look at Jim
And threw the peanuts
Back at him
He needed
Burma-Shave |
Substitutes
Can let you down
Quicker
Than a
Strapless gown
Burma-Shave |
For shaving comfort
Without
A sting
That big blue tube
Has everything
Burma-Shave |
6 million housewives
Can’t be wrong
Who keep
Their husbands
Right along in
Burma-Shave |
Jar so big
Cost so small
Coolest
Smoothest
Shave of all
Burma-Shave |
Try a tube
Its cooling
Power
Refreshes like
An April shower
Burma-Shave |
One shave lasts
All day through
Face feels
Cool and
Smoother too
Burma-Shave |
Within this vale
Of toil
And sin
Your head grows bald
But not your chin
Burma-Shave |
Take
Your
Time
Not
Your life
Burma-Shave |
Cattle crossing
Means go slow
That old bull
Is some
Cow’s beau
Burma-Shave |
Does your husband
Misbehave
Grunt and grumble
Rant and rave?
Shoot the brute some
Burma-Shave |
The draftee
Tried a tube
And purred
Well whaddya know
I’ve been defurred
Burma-Shave |
Tho stiff
The beard
That Nature gave
It shaves
Like down with
Burma-Shave |
His crop of
Whiskers
Needed reaping
That’s what kept
His Lena leaping
Burma-Shave |
This cooling shave
Will never fail
To stamp
Its user
First class male
Burma-Shave |
Drinking drivers–
Nothing worse
They put
The quart
Before the hearse
Burma-Shave |
Said farmer Brown
Who’s bald
On top
Wish I could
Rotate the crop
Burma-Shave |
Men
With whiskers
‘Neath their noses
Oughta have to kiss
Like eskimoses
Burma-Shave |
Don’t
Try passing
On a slope
Unless you have
A periscope
Burma-Shave |
Passing cars
When you can’t see
May get you
A glimpse
Of eternity
Burma-Shave |
Don’t leave safety
To mere chance
That’s why
Belts are
Sold with pants
Burma-Shave |
At a quiz
Pa ain’t
No whiz
But he knows how
To keep Ma his
Burma-Shave |
Many a forest
Used to stand
Where a
Lighted match
Got out of hand
Burma-Shave |
Baby your skin
Keep it fitter
Or “baby”
Will get
Another sitter
Burma-Shave |
Use this cream
A day
Or two
Then don’t call her–
She’ll call you
Burma-Shave |
If daisies
Are your
Favorite flower
Keep pushin’ up those
Miles-per-hour
Burma-Shave |
He lit a match
To check gas tank
That’s why
They call him
Skinless frank
Burma-Shave |
The poorest guy
In the
Human race
Can have a
Million dollar face
Burma-Shave |
The one who
Drives when
He’s been drinking
Depends on you
To do his thinking
Burma-Shave |
Hardy men
Were the Caesars
Instead of razors
They used tweezers
Burma Shave |
The midnight
Ride of Paul
For beer
Led to a warmer
Hemishpere
Burma Shave |
Henry VIII
Sure Had Trouble
Short Term Wives
Long Term Stubble
Burma Shave |
Don’t stick your elbow
Out too far
Or it may
Go home
In another car!
Burma Shave |
When passing
Through school zones
Please drive slow.
Let’s let our
Little shavers
Grow.
Burma Shave |
A Man A Miss
A Car A Curve
He kissed the Miss
And missed the Curve
Burma Shave |
Prickley Pears
Are Picked for Pickles
But no Peach Picks
A Face that Prickles
Burma Shave |
Listen birds
These signs cost money
You can rest awhile
But don’t get Funny
Burma Shave |
Thirty days
Hath September
April, June,
an the Speed Offender.
Burma Shave. |
Don’t lose your head
To save a minute
You need your head
Your brains are in it
Burma Shave |
Statistics prove
Near and far
That folks who drive like crazy
..Are!
Burma Shave |
Round the curve
Lickety-split
Beautiful car
Wasn’t it?
Burma Shave |
Dim your lights
Behind a car
Let folks see
How bright you are
Burma Shave |
The bearded lady
Tried a jar
Now she’s a famous
Movie star
Burma Shave |
If you don’t know
Whose signs these are
You haven’t driven
Very far!
Burma Shave |
Ben met Anna
Made a hit
Neglected beard
Ben-Anna split.
Burma Shave |
Around the corner
Lickety-split
Beautiful car
Wasn’t it?
Burma Shave |
They missed the turn
The car went whizzin’
The fault was hern
The FUNERAL hisn
Burma Shave |
A nut at the wheel
A peach on his right
A curve in the road
Fruit salad that night
Burma Shave |
Angels who guard you
When you drive
Usually retire
At sixty-five
Burma Shave |
He had the ring,
He had the flat,
She felt his chin,
And that was that.
Burma Shave |
Ben met Anna,
Made a hit.
She felt his chin.
Ben – Anna split.
Burma Shave |
Shaving brush,
Was like old Rover.
When he died,
He died all over.
Burma Shave |
For painting cowshed,
Barn or fence,
Shaving brush
Is just immense.
Burma Shave |
Pity all the mighty Caesars.
They pulled each whisker
Out with tweezers.
Burma Shave |
He played the sax,
Had no B.O.
But his whiskers scratched,
So she let him go.
Burma Shave |
Snake rail fences
And old log houses
Both were built,
To keep out the cowses
Burma Shave |
Bristly beard or silky fuzz,
Shave ’em back,
To where they was
Burma Shave |
Pink toothbrush
Is a curse.
Pink shaving brush
Is a darn sight worse.
Burma Shave |
College boys,
Your courage muster.
Shave off that fuzz
And cookie duster.
Burma Shave |
Farewell O verse,
Along the road.
How sad to see,
You’re out of mode.
Burma Shave |
You can drive
A mile a minute
But there is no
Future in it.
Burma Shave |
Free !
Free !
A trip to Mars
For 500 empty jars
Burma-Shave |
Car in ditch
Man in tree
Moon was full
So was he!
Burma Shave |
Dinah doesn’t
Treat him right
But if he’d shave
Dinah-might!
Burma Shave |
Substitutes
Will let you down
Quicker than
A strapless gown
Burma Shave |
Don’t take
A curve at
Sixty per
We hate to lose
A customer
Burma-Shave |
In this vale
Of toil and sin
Your head grows bald
But not your chin.
Burma Shave |
If hugging on Highways
Is your sport
Trade in your car
For a davenport.
Burma Shave |
My cheek
Said she
Is smooth as satin
Ha Ha Said he
That’s mine your’re pattin’
Burma Shave |
She kissed the hairbrush
By mistake;
She thought it was
Her husband, Jake
Burma Shave |
Don’t put your arm out
Quite so far;
It might go home
In another car
Burma Shave |
Proper distance
To him was bunk
He ended up
In some guy’s trunk.
Burma Shave. |
A man who passes
On hills and curves
Is not a man of iron nerves
He’s crazy
Burma Shave |
Famous words
About lights that shine
If he won’t dim his
I won’t dim mine
Burma Shave |
Are your whiskers
When you wake
Tougher than
A two bit steak?
Burma Shave |
This shave
Is like
A parachute
There isn’t
Any substitute
Burma Shave |
The salesman
Taught the
Farmer’s daughter
To plant
Her tu-lips
Where she otter
Burma Shave |
Be a Noble
Not a Knave
Caesar Uses
Burma Shave |
Henry the 8th
Sure had trouble
Short term wives
Long term stubble
Burma Shave |
If you must test
Her pucker paint
Be sure to drive
Where traffic ain’t
Burma Shave |
To shave it dry
You shouldn’t risk it
Use Burma Shave
On your wiska
Burma Shave |
The Midnight Ride
Of Paul for beer
Led to a warmer
Hemisphere
Burma Shave |
His tenor voice
She thought divine
‘Til whiskers scratched
Sweet Adeline
Burma Shave |
He’s the guy
The girls forgot
Tho’ he was smooth
His face was not
Burma Shave |
If You Wake In Haste
Then Brush Your Teeth With Paste
You’ll Get
A Funny Taste
Burma Shave |
A peach
Looks Good
With lots of fuzz
Man’s no peach
And never was
Burma Shave |
The Sun Does Riz
The Sun Done Set
And We Ain’t Out
Of Texas Yet
Burma Shave |
The Spring Has Sprung
The Grass Has Riz
Where Last Years
Care Less Driver Is
Burma Shave |
I proposed to Ida
Ida refused
I’da won my Ida
If I’da used
Burma Shave |
If your mad pull over
Or you’ll be even madder
When they lay you out
On a marble platter
Burma Shave |
In This Time
Of Toil and Sin
Your Head Grows Bald
But Not Your Chin
Burma Shave |
A Man Who Drives
When He’s Drunk
Should Haul His Coffin
In His Trunk
Burma Shave |
The Queen of Hearts
Now Loves the Knave
The King Ran Out Of
Burma Shave |
We’ve Made Grandpa
Look So Youthful
That His Draftboard
Thinks He’s Untruthful
Burma Shave |
To Get Away
From Hairy Apes
Ladies Jump
From Fire Escapes
Burma Shave |
Use our shave
And we betcha
The girls won’t wait
They’ll come and getcha
Burma Shave |
Remember this
If you’d be spared
Trains don’t whistle
Because they’re scared!
Burma Shave |
The most dangerous part,
Of an automobile
Is the one Loose Nut
Behind the wheel!
Burma Shave |
Do not pass
On curve or hill.
If the cops don’t get you,
The mortician will.
Burma Shave |
Angels who guard you
When you drive
Usually retire
at sixty-five
Burma Shave |
Suzy made her car
go faster
Suzy’s headed
for disaster
Burma Shave |
Red light flashing for all to find
Driver very color blind
Thought the light was blinking green
Never more will he be seen
Burma Shave |
Electric razors
Marked the grave
Of our beloved
Burma Shave |
O loverboy
Your picture came
But your beard’s too wide
To fit the frame
Burma Shave |
A car, A kiss
A Miss, A curve
He kissed the Miss
But missed the curve
Burma Shave |
If harmony
Is what
You crave
Then buy a tub of
Burma Shave |
Into the curve,
they both came whizzin’
fault was hers,
funeral hizzin’
Burma Shave |
Thunder roared
Lightning flashed
A tree fell down
A frog got smashed
Burma Shave |
For faces
That go places
Burma Shave |
This will never come to pass
A backseat driver
Out of gas
Burma Shave |
He saw the train
and tried to duck it
Kicked first the gas
and then the bucket
Burma Shave |
Fire,Fire
Keep cool
Be Brave
Grab your pants and
Burma Shave |
If harmony
Is what you crave
Then try a tuba
Burma Shave |
Guys whose eyes
Are in their backs
Get halos crossing
Railroad tracks
Burma Shave |
Cattle crossing
Means go slow
That old bull
Is some cow’s beau
Burma Shave |
Substitutes
Are like a girdle
They find some jobs
They just can’t hurdle
Burma Shave |
My man won’t shave
Says Hazel Huz
But I should worry
Dora’s does
Burma-Shave |
Henry the Eighth
Prince of Friskers
Lost five wives
But kept his whiskers
Burma-Shave |
Rip a fender
Off your car
Send it in
For a half pound jar
Burma-Shave |
Past schoolhouses
Take it slow
Let the little
Shavers grow
Burma-Shave |
Every shaver
Now can snore
Six more minutes
Than before
Burma-Shave |
Down the road
Look at him go
Around the curve lickety split
Beautiful car wasn’t it!
Burma Shave |
If daisies are
Your favorite flower
Keep pushing up
Those miles per hour
Burma Shave |
High-powered car
Drunken caper
Long sad story
In the paper
Burma-Shave |
The cannoneers
With hairy ears
Used tin shears
Until they found
Burma-Shave |
The place to pass
On curves you know
Is only at
A beauty show
Burma Shave |
If daisies are
Your favorite flower
Keep on pushin’ up
Those miles per hour
Burma Shave |
Around the curve
Licketysplit
Beautiful Car
Wasn’t it
Burma Shave |
Ma loved Pa
Pa loved women
Till ma caught Pa
With Women Swimmin
Burma Shave |
Would be more fun
To go by air
If we could put
Our signs up there
Burma Shave |
Thank you from my heart
To all of you
Who upon this page
contributed their art
Burma Shave / Webmaster |