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Whereas, on an occasion immediately
preceding the Nativity festival, throughout a certain dwelling unit,
quiet descended, in which could be heard no disturbance, not even the
sound emitted by a diminutive rodent related to, and in form resembling,
a rat; and
Whereas, the offspring of the occupants had affixed their tubular,
closely knit coverings for the nether limbs to the flue of the fireplace
in expectation that a personage known as St.Nicholas would arrive; and
Whereas, said offspring had become somnolent, and were entertaining re:
saccharine-flavored fruit; and
Whereas, the adult male of the family, et ux, attired in proper
headgear, had also become quiescent in anticipation of nocturnal
inertia; and
Whereas, a distraction on the snowy acreage outside aroused the owner to
investigate; and Whereas, he perceived in a most unbelieving manner a
vehicle propelled by eight domesticated quadrapeds of a species found in
arctic regions; and
Whereas, a most odd rotund gentleman was entreating the aforesaid
animals by their appellations, as follows:
"Your immediate co-operation is requested. Dasher, Dancer, Prancer,
and Vixen; and collective action by you will be much appreciated, Comet,
Cupid, Donder, and Blitzen"; and
Whereas, subsequent to the above, there occurred a swift descent to the
hearth by the aforementioned gentleman, where he proceeded to deposit
gratuities in the aforementioned tubular coverings.
Now, therefore, be ye advised: that upon completion of these acts, and
upon his return to his original point of departure, he proclaimed a
felicitation of the type prevalent and suitable to these occasions, ie:
Merry Christmas to All and to All a Good Night! |